thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
Randomize
