Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
