i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
It's never too late to be topless.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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