I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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