White coat. Heels.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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