We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
