how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
Just broke into the basement of my house via my american red cross blood donor card. I officially save lives
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