I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
my shit smells like andre
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
