i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
All the doctor said was why
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Randomize
