I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I just want to make out with him forever
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
