Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
Randomize