so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
