hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
