spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
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