the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
In America we eat man semen.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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