There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Until you've snorted cocaine at 6am before your nursing school clinicals birthing babies you're not on my level
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
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