Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
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