Where are you?
In a non slutty way
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
Randomize
