Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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