ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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