I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
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