im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize