do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Randomize
