xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
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