She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Is it penis luge time yet?
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize
