Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
