I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
