The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Eating pizza in the bath tub while watching a romantic comedy alone. I reached a new level of single.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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