Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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