Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Just so were clear your wife is cut off from my dick.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
