I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Randomize
