i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Hiking for a first date sounded like a good idea in theory because there was absolutely no possibility of me blacking out. In practice, I'd rather black out than go through what I just went through.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
