i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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