Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You made out with two different species that night
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Randomize