Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
