i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
i should teach a seminar on how to fall off the wagon
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Randomize
