Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Randomize
