ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
All I want is dick and wine.
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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