school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
