we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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