dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
also. he gave me a foot massage during 69ing when i got a cramp. he's a winner.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize