my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
Randomize
