So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Be still, my beating vagina.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
