u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
