Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
I intend to get homeless drunk
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
I went around and congratulated every guy that had a beard for having one
Goddamn tequila
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
