and you said cock pushups were impossible
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
