i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize