he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Drunk me wrote a bucket list last night. #4 is "hate fuck a childhood enemy". Can we make this happen?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It's official: I now only own one pair of jeans that I haven't blown the crotch out of. It might be time to put a stop to red wine Wednesdays.
You mean, in addition to red wine every-fucking-days?
Randomize
