Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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