good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize