i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
