My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
