I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
